Music for the Eschaton Part 1: Blue Argyle Socks from Grandma like Jazz
Published Monday, November 13, 2006 by Robert.
A best selling less-than-articulate author once said:
As kids around Christmas time, we truly learned how place our contentment on expectations. We made lists, vicariously shopped through the JC Penny catalog, wrote letters to Santa and perhaps did nothing short of campaign to our parents (that was if they were lucky). Me, I was the type of kid that had great expectations, but rarely spoke of them. This was my way of "hedging" my own disappointment.
On the morning of December 25th we anxiously awoke to see. Upon opening the various gifts, we knew that most surprises are bad surprises. That pair of baby blue argyle socks from grandma. The flannel pjs that I really needed. A coat... No, we didn't wanted to be surprised on Christmas. That was a myth! We wanted to open those packages and see that what was in them was exactly what we expected to be in them. The very things that, we as children, were entitled too. What ultimately determined whether or not we really liked Christmas was the degree to which our expectations were met.
That leads me to my point. Jazz is like God, Donald. Whether we admit it or not, we Christians heap tremendous expectations on what God is doing in us, through us, for us. (not unlike the expectations we had for Santa Claus... strangely enough, this idea is logically consistent with Arminian theology... hence it's overwhelming popularity in our culture) When Gods plans don't meet our expectations for our lives, we dislike Him.
We dislike God when He brings dissonant suffering into our lives. We don't expect suffering. We expect pleasure and room for self reliance from God. The unique thing about Christianity as a world view is that it offers us resolution. Only Christians can actually celebrate discomfort. Why should we be excited by dissonance? Why does the bible tell us to rejoice in suffering? Because, it points us to the resolution. It points us to the "not yet". Robert Johnson is singing a song that started with Adam. John Coltrane is playing notes from Job. Blues is music for the Covenant. Jazz is music for the Eschaton.
Note: Tonal blues elements actually resonate naturally in physics as they are an extension of the overtone series. One could argue that its presence in worship liturgy is as appropriate (or more) than the western "tempered based" classics.
Maybe Christianity should come with a disclaimer: "what you don't know God (or jazz) may hurt you".
"I never liked jazz music because jazz doesn't resolve. But sometimes you have to watch somebody love something before you can love it yourself ...I used to not like God because God didn't resolve..."As a jazz musician, I don't really know what he's talking about. Resolution is not a requirement of jazz, but it certainly is permitted. Just because we don't understand something, doesn't mean it doesn't have order or resolution. In fact, I think disliking jazz has very little to do with resolution. Its actually much bigger, much broader than that. What people don't like about jazz is that it doesn't adequately meet their preconceived musical expectations.
As kids around Christmas time, we truly learned how place our contentment on expectations. We made lists, vicariously shopped through the JC Penny catalog, wrote letters to Santa and perhaps did nothing short of campaign to our parents (that was if they were lucky). Me, I was the type of kid that had great expectations, but rarely spoke of them. This was my way of "hedging" my own disappointment.
On the morning of December 25th we anxiously awoke to see. Upon opening the various gifts, we knew that most surprises are bad surprises. That pair of baby blue argyle socks from grandma. The flannel pjs that I really needed. A coat... No, we didn't wanted to be surprised on Christmas. That was a myth! We wanted to open those packages and see that what was in them was exactly what we expected to be in them. The very things that, we as children, were entitled too. What ultimately determined whether or not we really liked Christmas was the degree to which our expectations were met.
That leads me to my point. Jazz is like God, Donald. Whether we admit it or not, we Christians heap tremendous expectations on what God is doing in us, through us, for us. (not unlike the expectations we had for Santa Claus... strangely enough, this idea is logically consistent with Arminian theology... hence it's overwhelming popularity in our culture) When Gods plans don't meet our expectations for our lives, we dislike Him.
We dislike God when He brings dissonant suffering into our lives. We don't expect suffering. We expect pleasure and room for self reliance from God. The unique thing about Christianity as a world view is that it offers us resolution. Only Christians can actually celebrate discomfort. Why should we be excited by dissonance? Why does the bible tell us to rejoice in suffering? Because, it points us to the resolution. It points us to the "not yet". Robert Johnson is singing a song that started with Adam. John Coltrane is playing notes from Job. Blues is music for the Covenant. Jazz is music for the Eschaton.
Note: Tonal blues elements actually resonate naturally in physics as they are an extension of the overtone series. One could argue that its presence in worship liturgy is as appropriate (or more) than the western "tempered based" classics.
Maybe Christianity should come with a disclaimer: "what you don't know God (or jazz) may hurt you".
The Semi-Pelagian Narrower Catechism
Published Thursday, May 25, 2006 by Robert.
This is so good, I had to put it on a place where I could find it... my blog.
1. Q: What is the chief end of each individual Christian?
A: Each individual Christian's chief end is to get saved. This is the first and great commandment.
2. Q: And what is the second great commandment?
A: The second, which is like unto it, is to get as many others saved as he can.
3. Q: What one work is required of thee for thy salvation?
A: It is required of me for my salvation that I make a Decision for Christ, which meaneth to accept Him into my heart to be my personal lord'n'saviour
4. Q: At what time must thou perform this work?
A: I must perform this work at such time as I have reached the Age of Accountability.
5. Q: At what time wilt thou have reached this Age?
A: That is a trick question. In order to determine this time, my mind must needs be sharper than any two-edged sword, able to pierce even to the division of bone and marrow; for, alas, the Age of Accountability is different for each individual, and is thus unknowable.
6. Q: By what means is a Decision for Christ made?
A: A Decision for Christ is made, not according to His own purpose and grace which was given to me in Christ Jesus before the world began, but according to the exercise of my own Free Will in saying the Sinner's Prayer in my own words.
7. Q: If it be true then that man is responsible for this Decision, how then can God be sovereign?
A: He cannot be. God sovereignly chose not to be sovereign, and is therefore dependent upon me to come to Him for salvation. He standeth outside the door of my heart, forlornly knocking, until such time as I Decide to let Him in.
8. Q: How then can we make such a Decision, seeing that the Scripture saith, we are dead in our trespasses and sins?
A: By this the Scripture meaneth, not that we are dead, but only that we are sick or injured in them.
9. Q: What is the assurance of thy salvation?
A: The assurance of thy salvation is, that I know the date on which I prayed the Sinner's Prayer, and have duly written this date on an official Decision card.
10. Q: What is thy story? What is thy song?
A: Praising my Savior all the day long.
11. Q: You ask me how I know he lives?
A: He lives within my heart.
12. Q: And what else hast thou got in thine heart?
A: I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.
13. Q: Where??
A: Down in my heart!
14. Q: Where???
A: Down in my heart!!
15. Q: What witness aid hath been given us as a technique by which we may win souls?
A: The tract known commonly as the Four Spiritual Laws, is the chief aid whereby we may win souls.
16. Q: What doth this tract principally teach?
A: The Four Spiritual Laws principally teach, that God's entire plan for history and the universe centereth on me, and that I am powerful enough to thwart His divine purpose if I refuse to let Him pursue His Wonderful Plan for my life.
17. Q: What supplementary technique is given by which we may win souls?
A: The technique of giving our own Personal Testimony, in the which we must always be ready to give an answer concerning the years we spent in vanity and pride, and the wretched vices in which we wallowed all our lives until
the day we got saved.
18. Q: I'm so happy, what's the reason why?
A: Jesus took my burden all away!
19. Q: What are the means given whereby we may save large crowds of souls in a spectacular manner?
A: Such a spectacle is accomplished by means of well-publicized Crusades and Revivals which (in order that none may be loath to attend) are best conducted anywhere else but in a Church.
20. Q: Am I a soldier of the Cross?
A: I am a soldier of the Cross if I join Campus Crusade, Boys' Brigade, the Salvation Army, or the Wheaton Crusaders; of if I put on the helmet of Dispensationalism, the breastplate of Pietism, the shield of Tribulationism, and the sword of Zionism, having my feet shod with the gospel of Arminianism.
21. Q: Who is your boss?
A: My boss is a Jewish carpenter.
22. Q: Hath God predestined vessels of wrath to Hell?
A: God hath never performed such an omnipotent act, for any such thing would not reflect His primary attribute, which is Niceness.
23. Q: What is sanctification?
A: Sanctification is the work of my free Will, whereby I am renewed by having my Daily Quiet Time.
24. Q: What rule hath God for our direction in prayer?
A: The rule that we must bow our hands, close our heads, and fold our eyes.
25. Q: What doth the Lord's Prayer teach us?
A: The Lord's Prayer teacheth us that we must never memorize a prayer, or use one that hath been written down.
26. Q: What's the book for thee?
A: The B-I-B-L-E.
27. Q: Which are among the first books which a Christian should read to his soul's health?
A: Among the first books which a Christian should read are the books of Daniel and Revelation, and The Late Great Planet Earth.
28. Q: Who is on the Lord's side?
A: He who doth support whatsoever is done by the nation of Israel, and who doth renounce the world, the flesh, and the Catholic Church.
29. Q: What are the seven deadly sins?
A: The seven deadly sins are smoking, drinking, dancing, card-playing, movie-going, baptizing babies, and having any creed but Christ.
30. Q: What is a sacrament?
A: A sacrament is an insidious invention devised by the Catholic Church whereby men are drawn into idolatry.
31. Q: What is the Lord's Supper?
A: The Lord's Supper is a dispensing of saltines and grape juice, in the which we remember Christ's command to pretend that they are His body and blood.
32. Q: What is baptism?
A: Baptism is the act whereby, by the performance of something that seems quite silly in front of everyone, I prove that I really, really mean it.
33. Q: What is the Church?
A: The Church is the tiny minority of individuals living at this time who have Jesus in their hearts, and who come together once a week for a sermon, fellowship and donuts.
34. Q: What is the office of the keys?
A: The office of the keys is that office held by the custodian.
35. Q: What meaneth "The Priesthood Of All Believers"?
A: The Priesthood Of All Believers meaneth that there exists no authority in the Church, as that falsely thought to be held by elders, presbyters, deacons, and bishops, but that each individual Christian acts as his own authority in all matters pertaining to the faith.
36. Q: Who is the Holy Spirit?
A: The Holy Spirit is a gentleman Who would never barge in.
37. Q: How long hath the Holy Spirit been at work?
A: The Holy Spirit hath been at work for more than a century: expressly, since the nineteenth-century Revitalization brought about by traveling Evangelists carrying tents across America.
38. Q: When will be the "Last Days" of which the Bible speaketh?
A: The "Last Days" are these days in which we are now living, in which the Antichrist, the Beast, and the Thief in the Night shall most certainly appear.
39. Q: What is the name of the event by which Christians will escape these dreadful entities?
A: The event commonly known as the Rapture, in the which it is our Blessed Hope that all cars driven by Christians will suddenly have no drivers.
40. Q: When is Jesus coming again?
A: Maybe morning, maybe noon, maybe evening, and maybe soon.
41. Q: When the roll, roll, roll, is called up yonder, where will you be?
A: There.
42. Q: Hallelu, hallelu, hallelu, hallelujah!
A: Praise ye the Lord!
43. Q: Praise ye the Lord!
A: Hallelujah!
44. Q: Where will we meet again?
A: Here, there, or in the air.
45. Q: Can I hear an Ay-men?
A: Ay-men.
1. Q: What is the chief end of each individual Christian?
A: Each individual Christian's chief end is to get saved. This is the first and great commandment.
2. Q: And what is the second great commandment?
A: The second, which is like unto it, is to get as many others saved as he can.
3. Q: What one work is required of thee for thy salvation?
A: It is required of me for my salvation that I make a Decision for Christ, which meaneth to accept Him into my heart to be my personal lord'n'saviour
4. Q: At what time must thou perform this work?
A: I must perform this work at such time as I have reached the Age of Accountability.
5. Q: At what time wilt thou have reached this Age?
A: That is a trick question. In order to determine this time, my mind must needs be sharper than any two-edged sword, able to pierce even to the division of bone and marrow; for, alas, the Age of Accountability is different for each individual, and is thus unknowable.
6. Q: By what means is a Decision for Christ made?
A: A Decision for Christ is made, not according to His own purpose and grace which was given to me in Christ Jesus before the world began, but according to the exercise of my own Free Will in saying the Sinner's Prayer in my own words.
7. Q: If it be true then that man is responsible for this Decision, how then can God be sovereign?
A: He cannot be. God sovereignly chose not to be sovereign, and is therefore dependent upon me to come to Him for salvation. He standeth outside the door of my heart, forlornly knocking, until such time as I Decide to let Him in.
8. Q: How then can we make such a Decision, seeing that the Scripture saith, we are dead in our trespasses and sins?
A: By this the Scripture meaneth, not that we are dead, but only that we are sick or injured in them.
9. Q: What is the assurance of thy salvation?
A: The assurance of thy salvation is, that I know the date on which I prayed the Sinner's Prayer, and have duly written this date on an official Decision card.
10. Q: What is thy story? What is thy song?
A: Praising my Savior all the day long.
11. Q: You ask me how I know he lives?
A: He lives within my heart.
12. Q: And what else hast thou got in thine heart?
A: I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart.
13. Q: Where??
A: Down in my heart!
14. Q: Where???
A: Down in my heart!!
15. Q: What witness aid hath been given us as a technique by which we may win souls?
A: The tract known commonly as the Four Spiritual Laws, is the chief aid whereby we may win souls.
16. Q: What doth this tract principally teach?
A: The Four Spiritual Laws principally teach, that God's entire plan for history and the universe centereth on me, and that I am powerful enough to thwart His divine purpose if I refuse to let Him pursue His Wonderful Plan for my life.
17. Q: What supplementary technique is given by which we may win souls?
A: The technique of giving our own Personal Testimony, in the which we must always be ready to give an answer concerning the years we spent in vanity and pride, and the wretched vices in which we wallowed all our lives until
the day we got saved.
18. Q: I'm so happy, what's the reason why?
A: Jesus took my burden all away!
19. Q: What are the means given whereby we may save large crowds of souls in a spectacular manner?
A: Such a spectacle is accomplished by means of well-publicized Crusades and Revivals which (in order that none may be loath to attend) are best conducted anywhere else but in a Church.
20. Q: Am I a soldier of the Cross?
A: I am a soldier of the Cross if I join Campus Crusade, Boys' Brigade, the Salvation Army, or the Wheaton Crusaders; of if I put on the helmet of Dispensationalism, the breastplate of Pietism, the shield of Tribulationism, and the sword of Zionism, having my feet shod with the gospel of Arminianism.
21. Q: Who is your boss?
A: My boss is a Jewish carpenter.
22. Q: Hath God predestined vessels of wrath to Hell?
A: God hath never performed such an omnipotent act, for any such thing would not reflect His primary attribute, which is Niceness.
23. Q: What is sanctification?
A: Sanctification is the work of my free Will, whereby I am renewed by having my Daily Quiet Time.
24. Q: What rule hath God for our direction in prayer?
A: The rule that we must bow our hands, close our heads, and fold our eyes.
25. Q: What doth the Lord's Prayer teach us?
A: The Lord's Prayer teacheth us that we must never memorize a prayer, or use one that hath been written down.
26. Q: What's the book for thee?
A: The B-I-B-L-E.
27. Q: Which are among the first books which a Christian should read to his soul's health?
A: Among the first books which a Christian should read are the books of Daniel and Revelation, and The Late Great Planet Earth.
28. Q: Who is on the Lord's side?
A: He who doth support whatsoever is done by the nation of Israel, and who doth renounce the world, the flesh, and the Catholic Church.
29. Q: What are the seven deadly sins?
A: The seven deadly sins are smoking, drinking, dancing, card-playing, movie-going, baptizing babies, and having any creed but Christ.
30. Q: What is a sacrament?
A: A sacrament is an insidious invention devised by the Catholic Church whereby men are drawn into idolatry.
31. Q: What is the Lord's Supper?
A: The Lord's Supper is a dispensing of saltines and grape juice, in the which we remember Christ's command to pretend that they are His body and blood.
32. Q: What is baptism?
A: Baptism is the act whereby, by the performance of something that seems quite silly in front of everyone, I prove that I really, really mean it.
33. Q: What is the Church?
A: The Church is the tiny minority of individuals living at this time who have Jesus in their hearts, and who come together once a week for a sermon, fellowship and donuts.
34. Q: What is the office of the keys?
A: The office of the keys is that office held by the custodian.
35. Q: What meaneth "The Priesthood Of All Believers"?
A: The Priesthood Of All Believers meaneth that there exists no authority in the Church, as that falsely thought to be held by elders, presbyters, deacons, and bishops, but that each individual Christian acts as his own authority in all matters pertaining to the faith.
36. Q: Who is the Holy Spirit?
A: The Holy Spirit is a gentleman Who would never barge in.
37. Q: How long hath the Holy Spirit been at work?
A: The Holy Spirit hath been at work for more than a century: expressly, since the nineteenth-century Revitalization brought about by traveling Evangelists carrying tents across America.
38. Q: When will be the "Last Days" of which the Bible speaketh?
A: The "Last Days" are these days in which we are now living, in which the Antichrist, the Beast, and the Thief in the Night shall most certainly appear.
39. Q: What is the name of the event by which Christians will escape these dreadful entities?
A: The event commonly known as the Rapture, in the which it is our Blessed Hope that all cars driven by Christians will suddenly have no drivers.
40. Q: When is Jesus coming again?
A: Maybe morning, maybe noon, maybe evening, and maybe soon.
41. Q: When the roll, roll, roll, is called up yonder, where will you be?
A: There.
42. Q: Hallelu, hallelu, hallelu, hallelujah!
A: Praise ye the Lord!
43. Q: Praise ye the Lord!
A: Hallelujah!
44. Q: Where will we meet again?
A: Here, there, or in the air.
45. Q: Can I hear an Ay-men?
A: Ay-men.
Is Biblical Christianity Really Practical?
Published Sunday, April 16, 2006 by Robert.
So, this morning I got up and turned on the TV (to celebrate the end of my Lenten TV fast of course). To the marriage of my fortuitous timing and channel selection, I stumbled across this weeks message from Houston's own Unity Church of Christianity.The sermon was somewhat consistent with what you would expect. In an nutshell, it goes like this: accept all spiritual beliefs as merely a different expression of the same truth, experience God in your own way (through your own personal enlightenment) and last but not least, add a few superlatives, a little gnosticism and TELL PEOPLE ABOUT IT!
At the end of the broadcast came the three "P"'s of Unity: Positive, Practical, Progressive. I guess the overall message of Christianity is positive (I you want to just skip to the end). Unfortunately, many mainstream evangelicals, whether they admit it or not, think of themselves as "progressive". I think it is the underlying gnostic motivation to get rid of all those old Catholic religious (read: bad) traditions.
Of all the "P" words, the one that really sticks with me is "Practical". Is Christianity really practical at all? Just how do we define what is practical and is not? Does this mean that we teach only the parts of the bible that is practical? Or, does this imply that there is a part of Christianity that is not practical? (and we shouldn't bother with it)
Jesus says, "take up your cross and follow me" and "he who loses his life will find it". Paul says, submit yourselves as "living sacrifices" and as "sheep to the slaughter". My question for the those "in Unity" is, is this part of the practical or impractical Christianity?
But, likewise, my question of those who claim to be orthodox is, are we sacrificing part of Christianity as impractical for the sake of our own comfort about ourselves?
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